B
ballad of page
It’s almost seven and the time is near
soon they’ll take me away
I know what I’ve done was wrong
the bars are so hard
and the walls are like hell
oh how I want to get out
of this dirty old cell
but I know when I do I’ll never return
because dying is a hard word to learn.
oh lord I wish I could live over again
oh lord I wish I could live over again
I thought Jesus was holding my hand
flying high on our last gram
and I left all I had
and I want it back
it seems all my demons have come to attack
and it’s easy to beg and so hard to change
help me god it’s not my way
oh lord I wish I could live over again
oh lord I wish I could live over again
I’m still alive now
but the time is near
soon he’ll take me away
I know what I’ve done was wrong
bang our glasses again
It’s been a year since we’ve spoken, there’s no one to blame
my life here is quite useless, but all and all it’s the same
I have letters for you on the table
but they are 3 weeks stale
not much new has happened, I just talk to myself
but soon we’ll meet in the Island
and have a drink again
yes soon we’ll meet my friend
bang our Glasses Again
I dreamed I lay in a coffin
and nobody came
the preacher stopped speaking
he never mentioned my name
but I didn’t care, no I didn’t care
I thought maybe I’d see my friend
and have a drink again
yes soon we’d meet my friend
and bang our glasses again
C
calm me down
I was breathing winter on Washington
blowing clouds on the porch
all the lights sits nice with snow on the ground
the radio flows easy
and there we were without a care in the world
at least so I remember
drinking whiskey with both hands
freeing doves in December
and you’d put your hand on my stomach and calm me down
calm me down
put your hand on my stomach and calm me down
calm me down
with my fingers in ears and my eyes shut tight
I felt the ground open
there’s no laughing round here
just tears on the tele, stut-stuttering chain smoking
with one friend gone time goes on
and a wrinkle sets in
I’ll take all my habits to good again
ain’t easy but trying
so put your hand on my stomach and calm me down
calm me down
put your hand on my stomach and calm me down
calm me down
now it’s one winter later
we sit like guilty children
there’s moss on the bedpost and dust on the pillow
no love in the kitchen
and I scream for 7 miles when I wake in the night
without a thought in my head
and I place my bets and collect my regrets
shake off the cold and make time to grow old
and I want to feel alive again
and not worry my head
I want to feel alive again
I need you in my bed
to put your hand on my stomach and calm me down
calm me down
put your hand on my stomach and calm me down
calm me down
capo 1
as I sit and I stare into the eyes of my dream
my feet sink in this saltwater stream
I hear the sounds of the waves and the songs of the wind
I’m finally alone safe and unseen
I pray for the day
when the sea will swallow my soul
surrounding me with water
and nowhere to fall
I sing my song for the seagulls and the bloodshot sunset
smoke a cigarette while my feet get wet
I pray for the day
when the sea will swallow my soul
surrounding me with water
and nowhere to fall
but it’s just a dream
an illusion in my mind
I know I’ll never be able
to leave you all behind
I pray for the day
when the sea will swallow my soul
surrounding me with water
and nowhere to fall
chant
well I found my low
and I can’t go there
I could drown you in velvet
and let you wear and tear
like an import from England
or a California queen
with eyes that fight
at everything you see
juan slings his line in rhyme
a penny for the preacher
is he trying to change the world
with the tongue of a teacher
I must confess I think you’re insane
but I understand
I can’t make your words
but I know where you stand
there’s a bomb in the bible
where mothers curse their child
this book will make you crosseyed
while your insides grow wild
making something of nothing
as the preacher sings
have you lost your ears
waiting for your wings
commotion
commotion commotion, shaking my head
everybody’s trippin on a sour death bed
waving there fists at the crowd outside I could be mad
but I smile instead
and I picture myself in a rainforest
with a girl feeding me grapes
and we do what we do quickly
before the clouds rains escape
it’s all commotion commotion, shaking my head
I got some echoes in my ears and my eyes all red
everybody’s crazy over banks of bread
I could be mad, but I smile instead
and the queen on her thrown on the telephone
she calls me so quietly
and she whispers in a voice even she can’t hear
do you miss me?
but I don’t
it’s all commotion commotion, shaking my head
I got some echoes in my ears and my eyes all red
and I share the wine, I share the bread
I don’t know how you ended up in my bed
i
t’s all commotion commotion shaking my head
I could be mad, but I smile instead
and the love lines cut as we walk on the line
I ain’t got no desire to set her flag on fire
I’ve been burned before and I’ve been wed
I could be mad
so don’t look back just to show me your tears
cause you’ll look back and laugh in a couple of years
I’m unstable and unable to face my fears
just caught in the commotion with you my dear
i
t’s all commotion commotion, shaking my head
commotion commotion, shaking my head
I got some echoes in my ears and my eyes all red
and I sit on my couch here with legs of lead
I could be mad, but I smile instead
couch the comfort
couch the comfort and bite the pain
everybody play insane
there’s chaos at the zoo
wild wild tigers come for you
and we can whip our way to safety
once again
until the children are all safe
until the children are all safe
until the children are all safe
but bloods been drawn
down by the bodega store
there’s zebras and lions
and the lions eat the zebras
over 12 dollars and mother hollars
juan is gone
my eldest sons been eaten
yes my eldest sons been eaten
lions run from the blue guns
rob the poor to build the funds
and they’re running free
just a little bit more
too may antelope lose the war
so we couch the comfort and bite the pain
everybody play insane
there’s chaos at the zoo
wild wild tigers come for you
and we can whip our way to safety
once again
until the children all learn
until the children all learn
until the children all learn
to be insane too
crack
I thought I met god, when he tripped me
for the third time, this morning
I stumbled with my hands, behind my back
and I cursed the ground
I fell for a girl
who dressed around her breasts
but she scratched her shoulder
as I passed
and crack makes you coo-coo
like sexy girls with bad ju-ju
I can’t explain but I understand
I remember I cried when they killed Bonnie and Clyde
the music was perfect as they fell to the floor
and I thought I found peace, for just one moment
with her on her knees and my eyes to the sky
I gripped her hair gently, and she opened her eyes
I can’t remember what color they were
and crack makes you coo-coo
like sexy girls with bad ju-ju
I can’t explain but I understand
crack makes you coo-coo
like sexy girls with bad ju-ju
some sugars can kill you
but which ones
I don’t know
D
drum beat bird hum
jumping door to door
the hearse will take me home
drive the night away
the wheels they take me home
where will they take me
I’ve landed my last punch
a whisper in the dark
a jab of silence
drum beat bird hum
drum beat bird hum
a break from the sound
drum beat bird hum
drum beat bird hum
it’s just another brain cloud
footsteps echo in me
running for leave
I jump into a high
it’s killing me
erasing you
erasing me
running out the door
this empty place a bore
drum beat bird hum
a break from silence
drum beat bird hum
are you high enough to dance
but how should I know
I don’t even want to understand
gonna keep on walking on
holding my shadow’s hand
what’s wrong with you my love
you’re insane to fall for me
I’ve broken every heart and hand
that’s tried to touch me
and do you own your blood
I want your last drop
can you be my band aid
can you make it all just stop
and yes I’ve died before
but no I won’t go down
I’d swallow the ocean before I drown
drum beat bird hum
burning in my brain
drum beat bird hum
I’d swear we’re all insane
but how should I know
I don’t even want to understand
gonna keep on walking on
holding my shadows hand
F
for a nickel in the road
so you’re taking my picture
you say you want to remember
it better than it ever was
but I see you laughing
I see you smiling
yes I’ll see you until the morning ends
now you’re lying so easy
saying you’re lying to please me
and the stories grow everyday
but I see you hiding
I see you crying
I’ll see you till the morning ends
and you get me one more time again
but I know you’ll leave me
I know you’ll leave me
for a nickel in the road
And so somebody loves you
Yeah somebody wants you
And you tell me it’s only a game
But I see you lying
I see you hiding
I’ll see you until the morning ends
Than you get me one more time again
Cuz I know you’ll leave me
I know you’ll leave me
For a nickel in the road
fuck you my friend
fuck you my friend
cuz I need you now
but you don’t give a damn
so fuck you my friend
I need you to lend a hand
I need you to understand
I need you to open your eyes
I need you on my side
well fuck you my friend
cuz I need you now
but you don’t give a damn
so fuck you my friend
awe it’s just not fair
awe you just don’t care
I always helped you up
when you were down on your luck
and now I need a hand
but you just don’t give a
fuck you my friend
cuz I need you now
but you don’t give a damn
so fuck you my friend
G
goodbye my friends dead and living
here’s to you my friends dead and living
those of you who left me behind
the month of May has never brought me sunshine
it’s been a year and I’ve lost much more than time
I thought about the future
thought about the past
thought about a lover
but I guess she couldn’t last
so goodbye my friends, dead and living
here’s to you my friends, dead and living
I suppose there’s nothing more to say
a change in season has got me asking questions
but you never answer anyway
I dreamed about the future
dreamed about the past
dreamed about a woman
but she woke me up so fast
so goodbye my friend dead and living
goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
goodbye my friends dead and living
good morning
tucked up tipping on two, which will it be?
I don’t want none of your charity
so slap me silent knock me down
dig a little hole in the ground and kiss me
goodbye
play me a song, the slowest song
one to calm me down
with a hum of angels and a circle of screams
saying “fuck it my friend,”
“it’s gone, it’s gone”
sing one more song and say
goodnight
wake me up tomorrow, God I’ve got more in me
I could sleep a million years if you stretch my luck again
for just one more day
then Lord send me away
I just want to hear them say
I just want to hear
good morning, good morning, good morning…
good respiration
hey you best take a break now
all and all it’s good respiration
so sleep like the dead
and wake up lovely
sing a song about the morning
sing it till the sun goes down
now I puff before I sleep
try to think things through
I never meant for my skin
to fall on you
you brought life to my imagination
and now the dream is gone
I’m a box of germs unopened
my red flag sinking in the sea
my steamboat she’s going down
saying “one more puff, will you die with me”
cuz all and all it’s good respiration
believe me, believe me
grin for grief
all the good people
they’re just waking up now
I haven’t slept yet
I haven’t slept
and tomorrow is yesterday
just like today
so live it up, live it up
that’s what I hear them say
and the poisons in my body
how I’ve learned to love them
and we eat em up, eat em up
and eat em up again
and the girl in my blanket
whom I fake my affections
I’d give her up
for some directions
there’s a grin for grief
grief for grin
back and forth and forth and back
you know I always win
now I wake up to the sunlight
shining from the windowsill
to the corner of my
left squinted eye
there’s fear over lost headache pills
you know the pain it makes her cry
under the cover I see my sunshine
with a blanket mark on her face
I sit back and smile
at the dog tail chase
there’s a grin for grief
grief for grin
back and forth and forth and back
you know I always win
now I blur my eyes inside
make the colors collide
wink eye to eye
make the world move
from side to side
and I say
where’s my east coast sunshine
tanline, shoreline, soulbride
I left her some time ago
ask me why and I will not know
but I guess the girls are still lovely
wherever you go
I guess the girls are still lovely
wherever you go
and there’s a grin for grief
grief for grin
back and forth and forth and back
you know I always win
the orchestras playing a memory of
a time when we smiled under east coast skies
sitting at the dock at the shinnecock co-op
with an empty bucket by her side
as she sat with a fishing pole in her hand
I sang her a song I knew only
she would understand
I got her high strung up
on my melody and
I got one sly hand creeping up her
pretty little knee
but don’t be fooled if you
decide to do this
she may not love you
she just loves the music
there’s a grin for grief
grief for grin
back and forth and forth and back
you know it makes my head spin
and as I laugh at the angels
sit and eat with the sin
yes I knew that I knew
that I’d always win
H
hospital windows
and all your wishes fallen
on an eyelash it’s a shame
but there’s so many more
you’ve hung on 18
13’s killed you all your
numbers at war
old men with Velcro shoes and
sweet old ladies singing the blues
on memories of children that have
grown old with them
but still they smile
between wakes and winter breaks
like flowers in the snow
they got what it takes
to survive you know but still
they cry and only they know why
I’m sure there’s a reason
there’s a season
for us to all come back again
like a baby, asleep
safe in its mother’s arms
and mother still sings
and who knows why
alls I wants a picture
just a plastic photograph
something to remember it all
please mr. Doctor
unchain me from my bed
these blue walls
and dirty halls
end empty corridors
they’re all getting in my head
and all your wishes fallen
on an eyelash it’s a shame
but there’s so many more
L
laid down
i used to sleep on my back
when life was better
I used to dream in the morning
let my blood run wild at night
but I can’t pass the thought of you
or a moment of silence
and I’ve lost the urge to enjoy my life
and I blame it all on you
since I watched you lay down
one last time
I watched you lay down
one last time
who’s to care if you’re crying
who’s to care if you’re not
I’ll make the most of my time
It’s the one thing I’ve got
and it’s easy to please the Gods
it’s easy to find love
but it’s over now
and I say to my friends
in this long life
since I watched you lay down
one last time
I watched you lay down
one last time
and I screamed for seven miles
as I held it all inside
M
mama’s little baby
baby lost her button but she
found her gold
too stressed too rest
like mothers in full moon
has everything gone bad
or is just nothing good
and you say oh oh oh
is it all that you know
oh oh oh mamas baby
has gone to war
there are socks by your pillow
there are acrobats in your bed
another blue orgy another long night
as long as we feel guilty
I guess it’s alright
and you say oh oh oh
is it all that we know
oh oh oh mamas babys
gone to war
I'd like to say I am
a left shouldered man
but the devil on my right
speaks my language too well
I’m spinning drunk here in my circles
seeing angels in hell
and they say momas little baby
has gone to war
oh oh oh mamas baby
has gone to war
and now with only good thoughts
maybe I can catch you
there’s no socks by my pillow
no thoughts on my shoulders
no sex in the sheets until the war is over
and so germs are all we wanted
but I’ll take your love too
whatever it is you want
I guess I want it too
and you say oh oh oh
I barely know you ya know
oh oh oh mamas babys
gone to war
milk and honey
I see how it is yeah
uppercut slide to the left jab
ducking on a sucker punch
I got me a band aid
I’m better, I’m better
milk and honey
I’m gonna get my belly full
smoke through the pain
doctors got my medicine
I’m better, I’m better
milk and Honey
I burned my thumb getting numb
damn these matches
these people are kind a funny
talking sweet and silly
while she’s cooking me breakfast
oh, Milk and Honey
and I see how it is yeah
uppercut slide to the left jab
ducking on a sucker punch
I can cook my own damn breakfast
and lick my lips
umm, milk and honey
all day long
all day long
milk and honey
N
network the jerk
network the jerk, joke the junky
america it’s our free country
the king corrupt and the queen is lazy
america you’ve gone crazy
mr. President he holds our blood in a glass of wine
cheers to china on your unlocked doors
spilling young blood on the enemies floor
and the businessman shooting the breeze under coconut trees
while big breasted vultures fall to their knees
watching the war on the big screen tv
network the jerk, joke the junky
america it’s our free country
the king corrupt the queen lazy
america you’ve gone crazy
and the black market man, he shakes my hand
on a deal of a dead man’s dream
look out, look out, look out son
things ain’t what they seem
some find god, some find love
some find the bathroom floor
hungry sick and asking for more
network the Jerk, joke the junky
america it’s our free country
the king corrupt the queen is lazy
america you’ve gone crazy
amazing grace
how sweet the sound
to save a wretch like me
I once was lost but now am found
god shed his grace on me
O
old man’s mantra
how I wish I could run
run through the puddles
play in the mud
like a little kid
worry free with innocent blood
those days are gone
I have only the memories
some photographs and old stories
one son gone
mother says sing me a happy song
say I can’t ma
I been here for too long
my brain is tired
got a dream, some hope
and a pocket full of dope
got a dream and some hope and
no place to go
I suppose I’m wasting all my time
stuck on a rhyme
that makes sense to no one but me
please ma, tell me I’m not crazy
and tell me you don’t believe
say you don’t say
I’m just one son gone
who never was around
got his head in the clouds
think’s he’s gods son
singing songs for everyone
this one’s for you but it’s
mostly for me
just want to see what I can do
and dad says son don’t be like me
get an education
be somebody, something I could never be
but you don’t understand it’s not for me
there are things I could never be
and tell me you don’t believe
say you don’t say
I’m just one son gone
who never was around
got his head in the clouds
think’s he’s gods son
singing songs for everyone
this one’s for you but it’s
mostly for me
just want to see what I can do
and mother says
sing me a happy song
give me a chance ma
give me a chance
it will all come to me
orchestras & highways
I’ve got orchestras and highways
the sound of Friday night
seeping through my window again
and when friends fail you new ones will come
if we’re alone in December, at least we’ll be drunk
and my old loves a lush, my new one not mine
a girl to laugh and cry and mean it in one time
prettiest in winter with the window open
sheets scattered around, the light on her skin
and for a moment the orchestras and highways were quiet
like a tear on a pillow or a worm in the snow
and I felt what I feel
when I remember it now
quiet is too easy, my bed no help
confidence killed the kitten
one story too high
it’s hard to find the middle and live without dying
it’s hard to make life perfect even when I’m trying
and now I’m stuck on the low end of a letter from court
not one fucking witness will come forward to talk
so I take my last dollar, I swear I don’t care
drown me in guilt I don’t need any air
because I felt what I feel
when I remember it now
like the one at fault in an accident
or a doctor who just couldn’t help
I felt what I feel
when I remember it now
P
painter's pub
has the winter left you drugged
and barefoot my love
has the wind pushed you to your path
has your lover’s coat left the hanger
will it ever come back
don’t sit so stiff my lady
you’ve done nothing wrong
I’ve seen you smile through almost everything
but I can’t be laughing along
and there’s always one reason, she’s got just one lie
to keep my head silly as I listen to her whine, and I say
put away your sad song
and I’ll put away mine
we’ll go down to painter’s pub
and have a good time
and no, no, no, I can’t do it no more
all my cupids and women at war
and they’re settling and giving
when you’re all I wanted
all I wanted
and
she says she hates for it to be this way
but her cold bones come too easily
and there’s always one reason, she’s got just one lie
to keep my head silly as I listen to her whine, and I say
put away your sad song
and I’ll put away mine
we’ll go down to painter’s pub
and have a good time
and I’ll never forget what you said that day
I even remember what you kept away
and all the troubles you hold on to so tight
gave them to me to keep me up at night
but it was enough to make her cry and too much for me
so I put my pants on and said goodbye
and there’s always one reason, she’s got just one lie
to keep my head silly as I listen to her whine, and I say
put away your sad song
and I’ll put away mine
w
e’ll go down to painter’s pub
and have a good time
a promise
when the trees have grown too tall
and the seeds are a memory
take the shade
take the shade
when your baby birds leave the nest
teach them all that you know
and wish for the best
then watch them fly
watch them fly
because no one likes time in a world full of pleasures
but some got to dig much longer to find their treasure
and I miss your touch, I need your love
I know you care more than any soul above
so I promise you this
I promise
the shade will be perfect
when my branches are all grown
and when my wings are calm
I’ll fly home
R
the robber
and the robber come take your baby
the robber come take your life
and the robber says he’s not crazy
but you know his heads not right
so you run to the corner
looking for a foreigner
wanting to push the blame
saying hey you motherfuckers
I know your names
it’s all over the daily
it’s stuck all on your face
the newspaper rubs
and the peepholes in place
and travelers trust travelers
when the natives seem distant
take me home where
the good word whispers
S
sinners, saints, & accidents
warm milk and ashtrays
you’re looking like a ghost
lying in your bed
wondering who you love the most
and there are sirens in the morning
they seep into your head
and I can see myself in the paper
on the front page dead
Sinners, saints, and accidents
come together all at once
all your demons get together
and try to through a punch
but you don’t have to kill your baby
if you take this little pill
I promise you darling
you won’t go to hell
and I say
only what I need
and you can love me
quietly
because I’ve been hiding
so your lover
won’t kill me
here we’re going uptown and I’m pushing her away
neither one of us should drive but I don’t want to stay
and she’s got me by the wing, and we’re both falling
and I’m gone I said, but I want it bad
there’s nothing left to say, I’m a boy so let me play
and she said give it to me give it to me give it to me
so I wake up at the airport by the hotel and say
that you can love me
quietly
I’ve been hiding
so your lover won’t kill me
please forget you know me
forget you know me
please, please, please
forget you know me
and you can love me
quietly
cause I’ve been hiding
so your lover
yes I’ve been hiding
so your lover won’t kill me
T
two thirty
It’s 2:30 in the morning and I’m falling asleep
I
’m drowning in your waters, I’m in too deep
In the middle of the ocean there’s a chill in my spine
I feel like a sucker fish who just bit your line
you’re reeling me in killing me and smiling
It’s 6 in the morning and I’m wide awake
the suns rising over this great blue lake
little by little it tiptoes in
rising higher as the tides changing
and when you open your eyes and see my face
I’ll be smiling at you and your tired ways
tickle me twice
tickle me twice I might laugh once
hold me too close I might throw a punch
meet me down by the kissing post
we’ll make the most of sad, sad eyes
everybody claim your cloud now
this one’s yours, this one’s mine
yes we can share it
but you know it’s still mine
I say everybody spot your star now
everybody claim a cloud
everybody stand tall
try to make your mother proud
I’d like to preach and plant apple seeds
like the greatest of men
but you know I know
I just can’t pretend
so I sing you what I wonder
as I quickly claim my cloud
and I’m laughing when you tickle
if the kissing posts around
and it all may seem like nonsense
these words that flow so sweet
if the tickle makes you laugh
don’t try to hide your feet
if the tickle makes you laugh
at the post we will meet
if the tickle makes you laugh
don’t try to hide your feet
tweekin on main st.
I said I dream in black and white
she wished me colors in the night
19 and like a child
knows not her left from right
she wakes up to write it down
another puzzle she found
tweekin on her new found faith
sleeping 18 hours straight
she said I died in her dreams last night
when she wore blonde, blonde hair
I woke this morning to find
that she had changed it red
“It’s not as pretty,
but it’s safer,” she said
and it’s fruit loops and monkeys
they all seem crazy
them caffeine junkies that
never look lazy
with 14 miles of chaos
that lead to dead ends
I know they seem stupid
but they are my friends
and we’re tweekin on main street
tweekin on main street
and there’s jibber jabber on the evening news
got 18 mysteries and not one clue
and cripple jipple is asking
for a hint on the rhyme
I offered the answers
but she’s out of line
and who am I to speak of redheads
with such bad dreams
I’m just like her with out color it seems
and she’s been living by time
and timing lives
poking at me while I sleep
whispering, “hey boy, are you still alive?”
and it’s fruit loops and monkeys
they all seem crazy
them caffeine junkies that
never look lazy
with 14 miles of chaos
that lead to dead ends
I know they seem stupid
but they are my friends
and we’re tweekin on main street
tweekin on main street
W
Waiting for Tonight
I’m gonna spend all my money tonight
I’m gonna take this town and do it right
Cause I’ve been waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting
Waiting for tonight
And babe comes walking through the door
And she’s dropping matches on my floor
But I won’t let it get me down
Cause for five days I’ve been waiting around
Waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting
Waiting for tonight
And working all week has got me weak
And my legs don’t work no more
And the bank is telling me I’m broke
But it never stopped me before
Cause I’ve been waiting, waiting, waiting
Waiting for tonight
I’m gonna spend all my money tonight
I’m gonna take this girl and do her right
Cause I’ve been waiting, waiting, waiting,
Waiting for tonight
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